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Tuesday, August 01, 2006

Hexed

How do you know if someone castes a spell on you? I think I was just cursed by a witch. I was driving home and the light turned red while I was waiting to turn left. Admittedly, I was in the cross walk, but I couldn't reverse because there was a car behind me. This woman with crazy hair begins to meander across the street. She was a little on the plump side and had gym shorts on with a cut off t shirt showing her belly. I was looking and began to give the, "Im sorry I'm in the cross walk" look when she starts talking to me and pointing at me in a very menacing way. It's about 100 degrees here, so thankfully I had my windows up and air on. She starts walking towards me pointing and twisting her fingers. She didn't even blink. She just starred at me, talking and pointing and walking. She got to the window of my car and poked it a couple of times. I think I may have been hypnotized because I could not look away from her. She had rotten teeth and old dirty fingernails. While I am not an expert at reading lips, I'm pretty sure the words coming out of her mouth were not english. She was saying them with the kind of hatred and disgust reserved only for cursing the guy that knowingly gave you syphilis. I really think she may have caste a spell on me. Luckily, my trance was broken when a bus was turning into the lane she was standing in. She walked on and I certainly didn't watch her. I'm afraid my hair will start falling out, or I'll get some skin condition that causes me to ooze stinky puss and bleed from my eyes. If I was hexed, how do I reverse it? Do I find the witch who cursed me, bring a burnt lamb offering and ask for the antidote? Truth be told, if this woman was a witch, and I was cursed, I think all I would need to bring her would be a crack pipe and a rock and she would wave her hand and my skin would heal and my hair would grow back. She just seemed like that kind of witch. Either way, I'm saving the fingerprints she left on my car, just in case.

1 Comments:

Anonymous Anonymous said...

I think I just found a new party trick.

2:41 PM

 

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